Reading this right now reminded me of a time when I'd flip to the comics in the newspaper.
Very fun read, thanks shoe (and company of course)!
Haha, exactly what I was thinking!!Originally Posted by praba
Hehe, every league needs a dink like "sludge". I'd like to think of Sludge as the person who brings everyone else together, as they all bitch about him to each other
"Can you believe that **** just offered me that????"
Goalies: If I'm pickin em you best be sittin em!
Hilarious conversations, Shoeless. Remind me of another, with the guy who tries to convince you just how unbelievably good his offer is.
Other guy: Hey, just sent you an offer. Hanzal for your Fowler.
Me: No thanks.
Other guy: C'mon, Hanzal is great. Fowler's +/- is gonna kill you.
Me: No thanks.
Other guy: What, are you crazy? Hanzal is gonna break out this year. He's Phoenix's best player, should be a lock for 60 points + lots of PIM.
Me: If you want Fowler, you'll have to offer someone other than Hanzal. I'm thinking Goligoski.
Other guy: Nah, I'm keeping Goligoski. C'mon, what do you say? Hanzal for Fowler?
Me: No.
Other guy: OK but you're gonna regret this. Hanzal is gonna be a stud.
Me: Sounds like a great guy to have on your team.
I can't promise I'll try but I'll try to try.
Yeah that guy is omnipresent - or the guy who really knows exactly what your team needs.
Sludge: Hey, Shoeless – I need a favor from you.
Shoeless: Sure, Sludge. What can I do for you?
Sludge: Well, I am going to the cottage for the weekend and I am pretty sure I will be on the clock Saturday in our draft and I was wondering if you would make my pick for me. You’re up just before me and I figured you would be around to make your pick and then you could do mine right away.
Shoeless: Well, I could do that, Sludge, but what if the guy I pick is the same guy you want?
Sludge: I don’t think that is very likely. So what do you say? Will you help me out?
Shoeless: You know, Sludge I would feel better if you got someone who doesn’t pick before you to do that for you. That way they can’t pick your guy before you are up and everything is clean.
Sludge: Well, I am leaving tonight and the only guys who don’t have a pick before me are Fritz and Cat and to tell you the honest truth, I don’t really trust them with this. I would feel so much better if you did it – I trust you.
Shoeless: Jeez. Well okay Sludge, I’ll do it on one condition.
Sludge: What’s that?
Shoeless: Well, I plan to go off the board for this pick and I am 99% sure my guy isn’t getting taken before my pick, so I am going to tell you who I am taking, just so you know there is no hanky-panky with my pick. Okay?
Sludge: Sounds fair, who are you going to pick?
Shoeless: Kiril Kabanov
Sludge: Holy crap, Shoeless – that was my pick. Man, how can you do that? I asked you for a favor and then you double-cross me by taking the guy I want. Don’t you have any scruples at all? Come on man, I’ll give you a chance, change your pick and then pick Kabanov for me.
Shoeless: Sludge, is there any possible way that we could pretend this conversation never took place?
Last edited by Shoeless; July 26, 2011 at 10:41 AM.
LOL!!! You know Shoeless, you should should turn these gems into weekly comic strips on this site. All you need as a good illustrator - you've certainly got the material!
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Honestly, Shoeless, that's so frickin' rude. I thought we were talking in private, I didn't think you'd tell the world our conversation. And worst of all, I told you never to call me "sludge" again. For frick's sake!!!!!!!!!
We get one of these - Don't waste it.
Best. Thread. Ever. I've got one that is my "highlight". We'll call this other GM "Fudge"
TK: Hey "Fudge", I've got a little interest in Skinner or James Neal, either of them up for sale?
Fudge: Ya, they are, and fairly cheap.
TK: Great, I'm thinking that If I gave you somebody like Vinny Lecavalier, a draft pick, and another defenseman it would be more than enough, right?
Fudge: Um, I'm looking for more. I'm thinking 3 of the following people for Neal: Datsyuk, Kesler, Richards, Semin, Rinne
TK: You're saying that the least I'd have to give up is Semin, Kesler, and Richards for James Neal...
Fudge: I'll throw in a 4th to help even it out.
TK: Bye Fudge
"We've had a couple shakers in this place. This year we haven't had the time. We had a couple good ones last year, right?" - Phil Kessel
The level of facepalm that guy just gave me was unreal if it's true. (in regards to Kabanov)
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G,A,+-,PIM,PPP,SHP,GWG,SOG,FW,HIT; GS,W,L,GAA,SA,SV, SV%,SO
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(LW) Ovechkin, Forseberg, Bertuzzi(RW),
(RW) Rantanen, Bratt(LW), Radulov
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EDIT: Oops, my bad, thought you were referencing an existing page
Last edited by VincentVega; July 26, 2011 at 10:58 AM.
I can't promise I'll try but I'll try to try.
I can't help but think about how embarassed the "fudges and sludges" are if they happen to be reading this thread lol.
Either that or they're going "These guys are all idiots, my guy is definitely worth more"
LOL VVThat would be sick if there was a section or something like that on the dobber sports network. There is so much good material on these boards on a daily basis haha.
Last edited by bondon; July 26, 2011 at 11:01 AM.
Goalies: If I'm pickin em you best be sittin em!
Don't even get me started talking about trading with you, Smack. First off, the character would not be called Sludge - something like Bizarro might work though.
Oh man. You've got some winners in your league Shoe.
I always enjoy the guys who like to dabble in broken goods, we’ll call him, Slick Eddy. One such example that happened in a 1 year I was in this year:
Ed: Hey Smokie, today is your lucky day!
Smokie: (Skepticism) Oh yeah?
Ed: Yeah man! I was just looking through my roster and was thinking I’d liked to shake it up a bit.
Smokie: What are you looking for?
Ed: Well man, I really need a Center and a LW so I am looking at Zetts and I’m feeling extra generous so I’m going to offer you Malkin!
Smokie: Really?
Ed: Yeah, it’s the least I can do seeing as how you’d be giving up a guy with dual status.
Smokie: Well I’ll consider it. (Goes to check dobber hockey forums: Malkin Injured)
Ed: Nope, one time offer man, if you don’t take the deal now I won’t offer it again I’ve got stuff cooking with “Gullible.”
Smokie: Well man I’m not sure, I might have to pass.
Ed: You’d be so stupid not to do it, Zetts is so injury prone!
Smokie: So this trade has nothing to do with Malkin being injured and out for the rest of the season right?
Ed: SH*T! When’d you read that?
Smokie: Just then on TSN.
Ed: It’s not as bad as they’re making it out to be.
Smokie: I’ll take my chances with Zetts.
Ed: Your loss man, your loss.
Exeunt Eddie who then proceeds to move on to his next victim.
See, the Slick Eddie type is always out for a good scam and I think is so disillusioned he sometimes cannot see through his own lies. What a tart.
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