I Love Fantasy Hockey Because...
I love fantasy hockey because it is something that not only allows me to talk trash on my friends (and their girlfriends), but it truly brings a group of people together. As Matthew Berry might say, fantasy is meant to be fun, and the real fun derives from building a cohesive bond between your core group of friends while debating Crosby's neurological condition, Gary Bettman's like-ability, or just the latest racist/homophobic Biznasty tweet.
All the distinct personalities present in our everyday lives are condensed and somehow amplified through the lens of fantasy hockey, and when our true personalities shine through on the fantasy world, then everyone wins. Sure, the purpose of fantasy hockey is to win. We flock to sites like Dobberhockey in order to glean every last shred of information about the studs and duds on our squads, and we read the words of Angus, Dobber, and Chris Nichols until our eyes bleed. Why, you ask? To win, of course. To have bragging rights over our friends and to admire the sight of a trophy on the mantle.
But all these things cloud the true benefit of fantasy hockey, one based on camaraderie and rooted in the hearts and minds of us all. In short, I love fantasy hockey because it brings me closer to the ones I love.
Ah, fantasy! The word that specifically DOESN’T describe everything else in my life. Responsibility here, consequences there – family, work, community involvement – life is serious business. Fantasy hockey is my release valve. Miss a deadline at work? Got to explain. Forget to take the garbage out…again? More ‘splainin’ to do. But if I forget to dress Cory Schneider for back-to-back shutouts, nobody cares! No real consequences.
And yet amidst this risk-free fantasy world that we indulge in, we simultaneously have the untamed ability to crush another man’s self-esteem as he scratches and claws to catch you in the standings, with weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth as the end of the season rapidly approaches. He seems to call out, “Oh, why…why did I ever think myself to know as much as you, O Great Hockey Maestro?!” …or at least that’s part of the fantasy. The Dobber Fantasy Guide also deserves some significant kudos in that scenario, but I digress. Either way, it’s part of the beauty of the whole charade.
Also, it makes me stay up and watch crazy games like Phoenix against San Jose simply because I’ve got one D-man on the ice. Maybe that’s not why I love fantasy hockey, but it’s certainly a testament to my ongoing romance with it. It’s a sport that defines us, bringing us together in a forum in which we can compete at times for nothing more than bragging rights. And when you have the privilege of enjoying it with friends, that’s all the reward you need.
Why I love Fantasy Hockey
Where to start? Well to begin the girlfriend hates it and not sure why but that makes anything more enjoyable.
The numbers aspect of it just flows through me, charts, graphs, advanced stats, projections... if only my 8th grade math teacher centered class around hockey!
Being able to watch any game any cheer for a player that you own or against your friend's star player.
Getting your buddy to say shutout when his goalie is 1 minute away from one and then lets one in.
The Draft party! All the prep and studying for it and the most shit talking and beer drinking the world has ever known!
Staying up till 12:30 to watch the outcome of the west cost games.
The internal struggle when your goaltender plays against your hometown team
Winning a slap-bet against your buddy for best season stats and saving the slap for the perfect moment
And well, because it's the cup... or at least the one we made.
I love fantasy hockey because even on a day with depressing news like today, I just spent 3+ hours in a bar with my co-commissioners debating how to set up the NHL portion of our our inaugural multi sport keeper league....and we didn't even get past the stat categories.
My addiction to fantasy hockey started many years ago
My buddy asked me to join his league but little did I know
I bought a book, gave it a look and headed to my first draft
It took me years of making terrible mistakes before I honed my craft
I started out quite simple, one team was enough for me
Points only with a bunch of friends and a little bit of money
But soon I’d learn that I would yearn for leagues a’plenty
Not one, not two, three or four, my league count grew to twenty
I’d pour over the waiver wires looking for a steal
I’d scour everyone’s trade block hoping to make a deal
I studied charts, and goalie starts I pinned standings on my wall
Multi-cat and points only leagues I learned to love them all
As a hockey player myself, I’m naturally a competitive guy
Its all about the win for me, I don’t play the game to “try”
I hate to rebuild, I try to be filled with guys who help me win
You better be ready if you’re in my league cause I’ll hit ya on the chin
So why do I love fantasy hockey I believe was the question asked
A lot of it comes from knowing that real life can be masked
When lifes not fair, and your teams going nowhere best hope you have a good wife
Fantasy hockey is more then a game, its simply a way of life
I love fantasy hockey.
I love carpet.
I love lamp.
- I love watching hockey.
- It provides a much needed cure for my boredom while in class, at the library, and at work.
- It has given me the opportunity to get to know more people
- I have been known to have a love for gambling. So much so that my friends sometimes call me Gamblor
Contest over. Axeman wins... That was beautiful dude.
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